The rise in monkeypox cases has prompted public health officials to go on the offensive by declaring an international emergency, renewing the call for more restrictions on personal freedom.
It’s also the most politically incorrect virus of all as it seemingly only targets gay men who have sex with other men. This glaring fact, plus the name of the virus itself, has set off the left’s offensiveness censors, prompting them to declare monkeypox as problematic.
We all know what happens when the left considers something to be ‘problematic.’
Metaphorical mountains will be moved in order to appease the highly-sensitive left at the expense of average people who simply want the facts about a new virus sweeping the nation.
Monkeypox, the left has determined, is not a suitable name as it evokes certain racial stereotypes about black people. This brings up one of the greatest moments of the China Virus pandemic when the left claimed the real virus was actually “white supremacy” and that COVID itself was actually racist against blacks.
Hilarious stuff, really.
To solve the branding problem with Monkeypox, Fox News host Tucker Carlson devised a perfect solution that should appease perpetually offended liberals who seek high and low for a reason to scream “RACISM!”
A poll of Tucker’s audience produced some pretty great alternative names for Monkeypox, but one seemed to resonate more than others.
“As long as they’re going to change the name, we should have some role in naming it. It shouldn’t be left up to Tony Fauci and Deborah Birx, so what should we call it?” Tucker asked his audience.
Audience members came up with some great names to replace Monkeypox, including “democracypox”, “politipox”, “sheep-pox”, and finally, the winner, “Schlong COVID.”
if public health authorities rename monkeypox, tucker suggests calling it "schlong COVID" pic.twitter.com/dHiHm1jKbZ
— Logan Hall (@loganclarkhall) July 28, 2022
The Biden administration has estimated that at least $7 billion will be required to contain the monkeypox outbreak in the U.S. A majority of those suffering from monkeypox are gay men, with one adult film actor saying he developed serious symptoms after a 20-man “birthday orgy” for a friend.
But advising that gay men stop having orgies would be against the rules for polite progressive society.
Author: Elizabeth Tierney