Biden Suddenly Changes His Mind On Aliens

In the past 24 hours, the United States has shot down a number of technically classified UFOs, putting the general public in the dark as to what is really going on. Unfortunately, since it’s the weekend, the President of the United States is, as usual, nowhere to be seen. Sure, aliens may attack us, but does that really justify Joe Biden performing his duties?The rest of us are handling the situation seriously in the meanwhile. I don’t believe the extraterrestrials are aware of what they are getting into.
 

The United States may only be at war with China if there isn’t an extraterrestrial invasion taking place. This is the good news. Furthermore, what could possibly go wrong with Biden in charge? Knowing that such a capable, level-headed individual is in command of the issue should make us all feel comfortable and secure.

Biden may be so afflicted with dementia that he is unable to recall the title and responsibilities of his Secretary of Defense, but at least he is not the evil orange guy, am I right? We’d be in serious trouble if our president took strong action and forbade other countries from violating our airspace, potentially inciting extraterrestrials to begin deluging us with UFOs.

But do you know what else has stood out to me during the recent chaos? Every defense he offered on the initial spy balloon has been totally disproven. Remember when it was prohibited to shoot down alien objects over land for fear that they would strike a school or another structure?

The president remarked, “I indicated I wanted it to be shot down as quickly as possible because the intelligence community as well as the Defense Dept. were concerned about the harm that may be done even in a huge state like Montana.”

“This monster was enormous. What would happen if it fell and struck a remote school? I thus instructed them to fire it down as quickly as they could. They made a smart choice,” Biden continued.

Because he has now ordered the shooting down of things over Alaska and Montana, I assume the president has determined that children are no longer relevant. Apparently, those large states are no longer too crowded to fire down a Chinese surveillance balloon before it could cross the entire American continent. Senses well.

Biden, on the other hand, was constantly lying about his inability to fire down the initial spy balloon sooner. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that his claim that he had ordered it shot down days earlier was a fabrication designed to disguise his lack of resolve. The fact that we are now shooting down UFOs over land, disproving the earlier justifications, provides strong evidence that he didn’t order the shootdown until the craft was ready to depart US seas.

Author: Blake Ambrose

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